I know I’m not alone as I lay in my bed feeling hopeless, lost and confused. My attempts at reading my personal development book resulted in tears and made me question my decisions even further. How did I get here? What happened that I ended up in this position? Yes my life may look put together from the outside. But I promise you it’s not. I have a million things that go through my head every day and they all seems to contradict each other. Nothing is ever black and white, how Id like it to be. NO! I swear my brain has invented new shades of grey just to make me even more confused than I already was.
What I thought I wanted for my life has hit a road block and to be honest I have no idea why! Why is it that pushing to live my dream and my passion is so hard?! I guess what they say about if it’s worth it it’s not easy is true. But boy this better be worth it! I love helping people and that will never change but I’m struggling right now for the distinction that I need to make this my own.
I am searching for something that only I will know what it is when I find it. No one else can tell me what it is except me. And let me tell you. That certainly doesn’t make things any easier! I know this dream I have for my life. But all the steps in between are so unclear.
So where do I go from here?
Forward! I know where I have come from and what I have been through and I am going to ensure that I use it to propel me into the life I dream about. I will ensure that my decisions and actions align with my goal. I want my whole life to be aligned. It is when one part of you is going against the rest that things stop making sense. When you feel like you are fighting to hold on to yourself or constantly needing to recharge, it is time to let go of what is causing that energy to be drawn out of you. It can only go on for so long. You can only fight for so long until you are broken down and you either give in or give up. Never let yourself reach that point. Listen to your gut and believe what it is telling you. It will never fail you. I promise you this.